Experiments in coffee-flavored yogurt
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Oct. 31st, 2006 | 10:26 pm
music: Fugies: Killing Me Softly
So I discovered, to my huge dismay, that Whole Foods did not have Brown Cow yogurt in the coffee flavor. SAFEWAY has it, but Whole Foods did not. What? That makes no sense.
So of course I had to make my own version of the coffee flavor.
1. Acquire one 32 oz container of plain Brown Cow yogurt, whole milk. I recommend mixing the yogurt before preceding. Brown Cow is famous for its yum layer of fat on top.
2. Grind a pot's worth of beans. Grind them extremely finely, for a very long time, much longer than you would for any normal pot of coffee.
3. Put a very small amount of water in your coffee maker, maybe 2 or 3 measuring cups. If you have an espresso maker, you could make espresso instead. The goal is to get very very dense strong coffee.
4. Take the resulting coffee and simmer it on the stove, not so hot that it boils, and take it off the heat before it sticks. The goal is to remove as much water as you can before it gets any nasty burny taste.
5. Add the resulting dense coffee to the yogurt, directly into the container. Mix until it appears swirly and magical and edible. Adjust levels to your personal preference of coffee goodness. I added about 1/4 cup, which is a lot. You probably don't need to add that much, but I like coffee flavor.
6. Add sweetener to taste. I added maybe 15 Splenda packets. Yes, I like Splenda. SHOCK HORROR. It tastes just fine to me and I like to avoid sugar. Let me know if I'm going to get cancer. Use whatever sugar works for you. I added a bit of brown sugar for variety. Brown sugar and coffee is delicious.
7. Add a few drops of Vanilla extract for kick.
8. Done!
Conclusion: DELICIOUS. Also, creamy and caffeinated. Perfect! I'm eating it right now. I'll be up all night, call if you want to talk.
So of course I had to make my own version of the coffee flavor.
1. Acquire one 32 oz container of plain Brown Cow yogurt, whole milk. I recommend mixing the yogurt before preceding. Brown Cow is famous for its yum layer of fat on top.
2. Grind a pot's worth of beans. Grind them extremely finely, for a very long time, much longer than you would for any normal pot of coffee.
3. Put a very small amount of water in your coffee maker, maybe 2 or 3 measuring cups. If you have an espresso maker, you could make espresso instead. The goal is to get very very dense strong coffee.
4. Take the resulting coffee and simmer it on the stove, not so hot that it boils, and take it off the heat before it sticks. The goal is to remove as much water as you can before it gets any nasty burny taste.
5. Add the resulting dense coffee to the yogurt, directly into the container. Mix until it appears swirly and magical and edible. Adjust levels to your personal preference of coffee goodness. I added about 1/4 cup, which is a lot. You probably don't need to add that much, but I like coffee flavor.
6. Add sweetener to taste. I added maybe 15 Splenda packets. Yes, I like Splenda. SHOCK HORROR. It tastes just fine to me and I like to avoid sugar. Let me know if I'm going to get cancer. Use whatever sugar works for you. I added a bit of brown sugar for variety. Brown sugar and coffee is delicious.
7. Add a few drops of Vanilla extract for kick.
8. Done!
Conclusion: DELICIOUS. Also, creamy and caffeinated. Perfect! I'm eating it right now. I'll be up all night, call if you want to talk.